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Satire

Monday troll: Men reporting themselves to police over Sheraton chicken

chicken at Sheraton Hotel. PHOTO/COURTESY

The police have been baffled by the number of men reporting themselves to various stations and asking to be locked up for a few days.
The first man reportedly said he was surrendering for a hit and run in Kyebando but there was no such incident on the road he claimed and officers soon found out that the man did not even know how to drive, let alone own a car.

As inquiries continued, the CPS in Kampala received four other reports of men handing themselves in for crimes officers could not understand.
It was only after a similar ‘suspect’ in Arua told officers that he only wanted to get away from a lover for a few days that police fixed the puzzle.

“It’s that Sheraton turkey,” said an officer at Jinja Road Police. “Apparently, these are men whose girlfriends asked to be taken out to eat turkey at Sheraton.”

Sheraton Hotel has a 5kg Christmas turkey going for Shs1.3m. To many men, it is better to spend time in a stinky-dingy cell than be pestered to sponsor the turkey treat.

* Disclaimer: This is a parody column

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