The pressure of fancy proposals

Ian Nkera Ford

Gone are the days of “tell your parents I am coming”. It is now about organising a summit, complete with delegates, a hired exotic venue under the pretext of a surprise marriage proposal.

Then we have our main celebrant, the future bride. She plans her own surprise party to her perfection and loses sleep about what to wear. It is her big day.

The day she will leave the sharks of singledom under the watch of her friends. Her friends marvel at the big rock on her fingers, her generous boyfriend.

Yes, that inhumane creature who has decided to embarrass every man out there with some lavish spending. They pray their boyfriends can get the memo.

On behalf of the ‘muntu wa wansi” fraternity, I would like to say we are not budging to this kind of behaviour which has left many of us feeling maligned and unworthy .Guys, I thought we were a brotherhood.

We all know many of you are not trying to be romantic but are doing these Hollywood proposals for likes and shares on Facebook. Brothers, we need to stick together as the economy caves in on us.

We understand that your side of finances might be bulging but think of the bigger picture. To inflate the economy with your worthless shillings as you also inflate our girlfriends with unrealistic expectations does not benefit anyone and that is the frank truth.

Save your chivalry for your wedding. Many of us have so much to deal with, from baby showers, bridal showers to bachelor parties. The whole process of tying the knot is already grueling financially so have some sympathy gentlemen.

These ladies are weighing us according to the weight of rings we can give them. Many guys are in hiding because the stakes have been raised higher. We shall dread that path for as long as people treat these unions like they were the Oscars or some caucus meeting.

As a person in the lower tax bracket, I will wait until this hullabaloo of expensive public marriage proposals stops before I start getting ideas. I call on unity among the guys. Let’s do it simple.

We cannot have these ladies expecting us to make miracles. Wama my personal person, tell your parents I am coming.