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Interview

All this hullabaloo about SMAU and all

Valentine’s plot: As people are preparing for Valentine’s Day, The Stingy Men Association of Uganda (SMAU) will be away at a Men’s conference this weekend discussing what stingy men discuss. Isaac Ssejjombwe got hold of some of the members and then two ladies on this whole biz.

Patrick Kanyomozi – PRO, SMAU

Can a relationship survive SMAU in reality?

To be honest I don’t think anyone can sustain a relationship based on the ‘true values’ of SMAU. I mean think about it. That would mean that no expensive presents, no dates at nice places, etc…

Ideal date…

Candlelit dinner on a balcony of a high rise building with a good view of the lake, sea or ocean. Or a date at the opera house, I have been to some good ones in Austria, Russia and France. Unfortunately I was alone but I think it can be a good place for a date.

One thing women should understand about men…

I am honestly not sure about this. But I think it is the fact that men want peace in a relationship. The nagging and tantrums can be a relationship killer.

How have you kept your relationship together amid Covid?

Covid came with a number of challenges but it also came with an advantage; we have managed to spend more time together. We have different work schedules and sometimes we take leave at different times of the year. We have spent a lot of time together with our kids but that doesn’t mean that we are always together; we always give each other space for some “me time”, which is equally important.

Collins Bareija Emeka – Speaker, SMAU

How are preps for the Men’s conference going?

Preps are going on well. The men are geared up for the conference. We’re all excited.

Can a relationship survive SMAU in reality?

Yes. All relationships can survive with SMAU. SMAU is for men who are single and have no plans of marrying anytime soon

Ideal date…

My ideal date is taking a walk to the next rolex stand and not spending more than 2K. (SMAU mentality).

One thing women need to understand about men…

Men will give you money willingly if you don’t ask for it. Secondly, we want peace, that’s all.

How have you kept your relationship together amid Covid?

Constant communication, meeting up frequently, being romantic as my name.

Medard Mugume – Chairman, SMAU

How are preps going for the meeting…

Preps for the men’s conference are in high gear, but this is specifically for the single men btw… SMAU is not against celebrating love only that we are against celebrating it with wrong people that actually don’t love us back but rather disguise to be in love just for their selfish interests. The Men’s conference therefore aims at guiding and orienting the single men that are yet to fall victims of these ladies that add little or no value to their lives.

Ideal date…

A lady that understands that love is not one sided. A relationship that is based on understanding and not material things helps the couple develop more love for each other and economically. So the ideal date would be a lady that understands that if I pay rent and utilities it is only fair for her to buy groceries at home or whatever she can afford.

One thing women need understand about men…

Women need to understand that men also love to be given and loved unconditionally just like we love women regardless of their endless demands and problems. A lady will say I need a man with a good job, a house, a car and good sense of humour, but they never tell us what they’re preparing to give to this ideal man they want.

How have you kept your relationship together amid Covid?

It hasn’t been easy but having an understanding woman won’t require a lot to survive through hard times. So a supportive partner helps you go through the hardest times.

Malaika Nnyanzi

Your take on the men’s conference slated this weekend?

I think the days are few. Can they go until like March so that the nice, kind and generous men are easier to find.

If SMAU was a thing, would you stay?

SMAU is a REAL thing. Ask women who have suffered at the hands of stingy men.

What’s your Valentine’s plan?

My Valentine has made all the plans, my job is to show up.

Your ideal date?

That’s a secret.

One thing men need to get right with women?

Everyone loves money….not just women. Spoil your woman, or someone else will.

Doreen Kabarebe

Your take on the SMAU men’s conference happening this weekend?

Why would a reasonable man attend such a conference? This is more of a hideout for bogus selfish guys who do not want to take care of women.

If SMAU was a thing, would you stay?

Why would I stay with a selfish guy? They’re poisonous to society. These are losers. They never leave the club, always asking for 2K from ladies.

What’s your Valentine’s plan?

Do reasonable people celebrate that? It’s like a couple wearing matching outfits in today’s generation. I find it local.

Your ideal date?

I don’t do dates.

One thing men need to get right with women?

Give women money, take care of them. You don’t feed from an empty cup. Men should learn to take care of a woman first before anything else.

Please note that SMAU and the Men’s Conference are all fictional unions.

NB: SMAU believes that girlfriends, wives, sisters, aunties must be given money and a lot of money btw.

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