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How to be the betraying Judas Iscariot

THE TRAITOR: Careful who will be giving you kisses on the cheek today because this is the same day that Judas Iscariot betrayed his master for mere silver coins. This disciple is no popular man in Christianity, so this is how you will tell if you are surrounded by the likes of him.

Easter is a big deal for all Christians around the world. It is a time of reflection and many other things. Need I go there? We all know the story I assume, unless you are on Season Infinity of Paganism. You might need to reflect on your life this weekend. I gave up for humans. Imagine God sent his only son on earth, put him in a human body, dressed him in filth to fit in and gave him the most undesirable job of saving the world. Chill Spiderman and company who need some fancy suits to pull off some heroics, Jesus of Nazareth looked as ordinary as they come. Even with the status he had in heaven, Jesus lowered himself to the ground, dined with the poor, the hopeless, and the persecuted. He came to save us all. But you can trust that chaps still showered Him with strokes of the cane, embarrassed Him before killing Him. That is how we humans roll. They now want him to return. Shaaaaaaa! You want Jesus to return in an era of guns, bombs and nuclear bombs? What will you do to him this time round? He can take as much time as he wants if he likes. On his tour of the earth, Jesus had his boys. Twelve guys who could have died by him. Loyal to the bone, walked everywhere with him and preached the gospel to whoever was willing to listen. They did this wholeheartedly until the last hour. Judas Iscariot, one of Jesus’ BFFs foxed him for 30 pieces of silver. Humans will sell their souls for money I tell you. Even after so many years, Judas Iscariot remains the poster boy of betrayal. You wanna be like Judas, here are your idle tips

Be two- faced
Judas Iscariot was Jesus’ most trusted and loyal disciple. Would you believe that? The guy followed Jesus everywhere for three years. Jesus later entrusted him with the group’s coffers as the Treasurer and like a smart ninja, he stole the money time and again. The son of Simon Iscariot was a perennial thief who couldn’t control himself. The lure of dime was hard to resist. (Kabafunzaki we see you) There are thieves everywhere. They come to church on Sundays, clad in their ‘Sunday Best’ and tithe dime from crooked deals. Some of them pose as politicians, pastors and nowadays, prophets. They flash cosmetic smiles, attend charity events and hoodwink people into thinking they would die for the people. They buy into this and throw away all their savings to these miracle men. As the poor people caress false hopes for years, some of these people such as pastors are blasting the flock’s tithe on monster rides, pampering hot young girls and hiding illegitimate children.
To be like Judas Iscariot, simply read the news around. There is so much inspiration in the many corruption stories that are reported.

Legit fox/snake/traitor
Judas legit foxed Jesus at the last hour. Some of us have been foxing God for years and going away with it. The VIP lounge in hell will be spacious, that is for sure. We are all a bunch of traitors in one way or another. We often want to bail ourselves out of trouble and look good before our superiors or simply because we don’t wish others any good and love to see them suffer. In Judas’ case, he was just being like a typical Ugandan, scouting for the next best deal. We are always willing to cash in for as long as the money looks good. Chaps will even place their wives for a bet on something as worthless as Arsenal (hey children, this is double-suicide, don’t try this). Nothing is dear to them. They lack compassion and will give you up at the first opportunity.
If I told you that I was in Dubai and you happen to see me in Wandegeya, it means you are also in London. Don’t complicate things by reporting me to the authorities. You can pretend you didn’t see me. Is this too much to ask? Bayuda are nothing but stress. Some of them coil in work places but we are certain they were groomed in high schools. If you want to be a Judas, look at everything as a trade-off. Trade microwaves, ridges and souls. There is no restriction to it.
Come to think of it, if Judas hadn’t snaked Jesus, he wouldn’t have died on the cross for us. Does this make Judas a hero? It’s your call.
There you have it. Go be like Judas Iscariot.

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