Andrew Kabuura’s bio has a very interesting clause; “renown sports journalist and DSTV African football commentator.”
You might guess that the weekend was one of a high for him for the obvious reason that many Ugandan football lovers had, that the Uganda Cranes football team qualified for the African Cup of Nations on Saturday with a game to spare.
Well that might be one of the reasons for his joy, but not the main one as he had scores of his own to net.
Mans like Kabuura landed, in my opinion-Uganda’s most beautiful and professional television face that is Flavia Tumusiime.
Kabuura and Flavia are twitter sweethearts, so yeah, even us online folks had to celebrate the marriage. Too bad, some of us got to know the information late, as Mr and Mrs Kabuura used the time for the Cranes games to have their own ceremony. Damn, Kabuura is such a shrewd man. In fact, @owomunshozi couldn’t have put it better
Andrew Kabuura finessed us as we paid attention to Uganda Cranes. ? pic.twitter.com/NA7aQBr71v
— Iribagiza David?? (@Owomunshozi) November 17, 2018
If any of you thought this was some joke or a dream, snap out of it. The man literally had his eyes on Flav the whole time
I want to look at someone the way Kabuura looks at Flavia pic.twitter.com/G66fIkcSBa
— Usual Suspect ? (@Jude_Mugabi) November 17, 2018
Like Flavia just went without doing her research on what options she had? Did she have no idea that guys like this existed? Let’s send her a warning. You can’t have your cake and eat it too.
But I think am better than Kabura.
Please Flavia am giving you the last chance. ??? pic.twitter.com/0zfS9HNAvi
— #1Musoga1Chapat (@kalelacomedian) November 17, 2018
Many of us were jilted of course. Out of the blue, the woman who has filled our fantasies with so many guilty pleasures just went and got locked down fwaa, but through our chief mourner @IamAPass, we shall keep on.
— A Pass Bagonza (@IamApass) November 18, 2018
While A Pass was playing chief mourner though, there were some tough questions to answer on his end. If y’all were in his shoes, what would you do?
If you were Apass,
Would you perform at Flavia’s Wedding/introduction???
— Mutesa III- Ugandana?????? (@ExWaJanetNePhio) November 17, 2018
Well, what to do? What God has put together can’t be laid asunder by any man, even when there are so many who would want to try. Glad that these two could find such a bond for themselves, let the rest of us get back to the drawing board. For Flavia, its game over, but not for Uganda Cranes.
On any other day, at this stage in a qualifier, calculators would be out, philosophers and professors would be busy and clergymen would change the script of prayer. All would be geared to calculate, using algebra and advanced trigonometry, the slim odds of the Cranes qualifying for AFCON, on top of many prayers to different gods. Not this time.
The Cranes have had the most impressive qualification run in years, locking down 13 points in 5 games, scoring 7 goals and conceding none. It was only fair that we take it to twitter and brag our data out.
I mean, take a look at this kinda pride
i would have made a tweet asking those whose countries have gone for afcon to RT and we know ourselves but it may only get RTs from Ugandans
— Soldier? (@PatohShanqueels) November 17, 2018
We even have revised the folks we shall associate with
Avoid tweeting with people whose countries don’t go for #Afcon
avoid bad luck at please
— Soldier? (@PatohShanqueels) November 17, 2018
Thank Cranes; the dog days seem to be over
#UgandaCranes needed calculators to work out the odds,
now we qualify with games to play. Birthdays were the worst days, now we drink champagne when we’re thirsty…
— Daniel Kalinaki (@Kalinaki) November 17, 2018
We will not even wait for 2019. We are already on that soaring life
— Ramathan Ggoobi (@rggoobi) November 17, 2018
What is this column without a little Bobi Wine? So the tale went that the biggest size an artiste can afford was nominated for an AFRIMMA Award as the best male artiste in East Africa. Much prestige without doubt and something worth bragging about. However, at the same award, Big Size’s longtime adversary and now political demagogue Bobi Wine would be a judge. Uh-oh…
This is how Bebe cool will look at Bobi wine at Afrimmas in Ghana pic.twitter.com/uRhUWU64Sd
— PIUS JADWAR (@One_PiusJadwar) November 15, 2018
Sometimes life really doesn’t give you lemons so that you make lemon juice. It may give you the lemons just to prove a point
I am still trying to picture Bebecool’s reaction upon learning that Bobiwine is a panelist at the awards he was nominated.
Life can mean to humble u in its own ways, cheii!
— Bunny? (@best_busingye) November 16, 2018
That’s a good week from me fam. Hopefully your wedding too will make it to this column one day.
Joshua Mulwana is on Twitter as @PirateMulwana