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How to date a superstar minus the drama

Tanasha Donna and Tanzanian singer Diamond Platnumz. PHOTO | COURTESY

This week, the media is awash with the breakup news between radio presenter and socialite Tanasha Donna and Tanzanian singer Diamond Platnumz. Other than the usual excitement that netizens have at learning that there is someone out there having it rougher than them, I’ve read a lot of pity towards Tanasha having been dumped, after ‘a lot of prior warnings,’ that the musician was going to move to another East African country lass next. There was a lot of empathy towards this poor, innocent young woman who was swooned by this superstar who then did her wrong.

Personally, I do not think that Tanasha is as gullible as we all seem to think or that she was caught off guard. From where I stand, if this whirlwind romance is indeed over, then she is leaving way better than she came. A thriving music career, numerous company endorsements and millions of subscribers and followers online. To me, this doesn’t seem like a loss. Let me ask you something, before the hook-up, did you know who Tanasha was? I bet many of us didn’t.

Well, I must say, this is an obvious script. Think about it, how is that every time a relationship between a woman and a high-profile man ends, there is usually one piece of advice women are given: Stay away from such relationships, they always end in tears!

I think not. I think that if a woman falls for a high profile man or a superstar and she wants to be with him she should go for it. Whether it ends in tears or not depends on how she conducts herself while at it.

I have always believed that no relationship, even the worst one is a waste of time or emotion. Each one teaches you something. When you are with a high profile man, be intentional about this growth. Being with him will open otherwise closed doors for you, your networks will expand, your social capital will grow. Use it. If this man happens to be a musical genius and you have always harbored a dream of being a musician, let him mentor you. If he will musically collaborate with you, let him.

We have all seen the lifestyles of the rich and famous African men. More often than not, he will have women throwing themselves at him at every turn. Do not become the foolish woman who thinks that your presence will change his character. If you want to get your place in his life, you have to know and accept your space.

If he has succeeded in building a business empire or a thriving music career, he is not stupid. Do not think that you will come, bed him for a few weeks or months and leave with a big house and car. You won’t. You can, however, use his goodwill to progress your life positively.

Finally, it will be good to remember that a man with power is a man who is not used to hearing the word ‘no’ very often. He will carry on this way. He might also be set in his ways. Instead of getting fixated into changing him into your dream man, you might want to save yourself the energy and pick your fights.

If you do marry him, do not be afraid to admit that you married rich. There is no shame in that.

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