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The wedding contribution……

……..should not separate us. If it comes late or not at all, this shouldn’t be a measure of my friendship or my undying loyalty. One small event shouldn’t hold the cards for a friendship that has stood the tests of time. Don’t allow it, at least now. Things happen. Some points in time are merry, others are plain whack. Sometimes our pockets are flowing, and others, as dry as the savannah.

It’s not personal. Don’t look at us funny or alienate us. We are your friends. Well, I am your friend. I want food at your wedding. In fact, all of it. Have I earned it? Yes, we have been through so much that I am rewarding myself by getting my belly full at your big day. No questions asked. My friendship is eternal, just like my appetite for sure. There is no price for it and that’s why our friendships shouldn’t hang on momental financial generosity. You get it?

However small or non-existent, we are here for you in kind or in spirit.  Mbu ‘spirits’ don’t cover the décor budget. Excuse you, whose philosophy is this? We shall not accept to be enslaved by people’s expectations. Some of them will have the nerve to question how a big man of your advanced age can only contribute 100k. Yes, boss/sis, this man of NSSF paying age with an extravagant pot-belly is only able to contribute that amount. It’s not by force, people.

Let people be willing to contribute however much they feel they can afford. Besides, no one is obliged to do so. Some people only do this because it’s an unfortunate culture that has eaten our society like a cancer. If you’re so hell-bent on squeezing any money out of your friends and relatives, it’s safe to say they have a stake in your marriage. We shall use the same energy to demand that everything at your wedding is top notch. No funny food or drinks running out. We are moving with you to your honeymoon destination, will share a bed with your spouse and engage in your extra-curricular activities henceforth. If it’s a stake you’re forcing us to buy, its one we shall take.

If you’re not financially ready to marry, it’s very okay to wait. Don’t besiege your family and friends under the pretext of having the wedding of the year. These people you think are your true friends because they burnt their pockets to ensure you got your dream wedding don’t necessarily have your interests at heart. Don’t get me wrong. If you true friends are willing to go that extra mile, then so be it. But they shouldn’t be put at ransom for it.

At the end of the day, my ka contribution, however small is from my heart. If people can’t afford to, they shouldn’t hide every time they see you. That said, adulting is an extreme sport. Imagine feeling ashamed not to attend your homies’ big day because of such expectations. We are breaking in, call the police!

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