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Keeping up with the Wests

 

None of us saw this happening. Rapper/entrepreneur Kanye West coming down to the 256 in emphatic fashion alongside his reality TV star wife, Kim Kardashian. Stuff of Holywood, right? Of all the beautiful destinations around the world that the two multi-millionaires would rather choose to vacation, they decided Uganda. Yes, the small ‘chaotic’ Uganda. Not in Kla, like you would expect, but to a luxury fortress in northern Uganda, Chobe Safaris. It is a relief after all the negativity hovering all over the country. For two global stars to bid their time on Uganda soil is good news whichever way you look at it. Some of you haters can sip on something.

Kim Kardashian alone is followed by a mammoth 119 million people on her Instagram page alone. Just one mention of her shenanigans in Uganda has the power to get thousands of foreigners running to Uganda. As surprising as it may seem, there are people who would find watching a bunch of hippos casually sunbathing on the Nile very exciting. And then you have Kanye. A man who makes so many enemies as quickly as he makes friends. A walking news mine. He makes news everywhere he goes. Only one man is crazy enough to hug Trump, Kanye! So many people I know would strangle him at first sight, but yo boy called him “my guy”. Only Kanye!
Their vacation to Uganda is recipe for entertainment, a sign of good things to come from Uganda’s tourism industry and a timely distraction from all the nonsense that has happened recently. To find out that Kanye chose to finish his album in the wild is hella satisfying. By the way they also came with rapper Big Sean who for some reason has been missing. Maybe OTT was a problem, you know these things. Maybe he could have been kidnapped by a short slay queen whose thirst for celebrity blood is unmatched. Banange ‘Kemigisha’ report to the police. People in this country are not nice.

But this Kanye guy pulling Kanyesigye moves fwa. Showing up in a country unannounced and taking over an area. Those mannerisms remind me of a certain tribe from western Uganda. Kanyesigye is from UG, no doubt. Dude met two Presidents within a week dressed in the same shirt. That confidence or rather arrogance can only be honed in the ‘West’ (saw what I did there, huh?) . Do you know what every Kanyesigye takes for his village people from abroad? You guessed right. Shoes! Nothing makes a villager happy like new shoes. Giving shoes to everyone, including the President is a Ugandan move. And trust the ‘grandpa’ to ask what the shoes do. Yeezy’s on the house, wow! We see you Kanyesigye. Welcome home.

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