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Not all men are the same

Ian Nkera Ford

A catalogue of broken hearts and promises are bound to scar anyone from the strongest to the fragile. A smile will be quickly swapped for a frown and a life devoid of emotion will be the norm. It is because the weight of disappointment from a broken relationship can be unbearable and particularly more painful if it was a person you held so dear who drew the dagger that stabbed you, more so, a soul mate or loved one.

I understand when women give up their last glim of hope on men and stick it out on their own after a series of disappointments. It makes sense when women look at guys with contempt and disgust as they feel betrayed and let down by the same people they have stood by time and again. They feel it is game over for men. No turning back. Quite harsh I must say!

Admittedly, I feel men have fallen short many a time but for women to stereotypically brand all men as dogs, psychopaths and sycophants is a little stretched and exaggerated. That would be a slap in the face for the decent lot of men who have consistently turned up when they were needed. For every cheating man, there is a very loyal and dedicated family man who cherishes his wife dearly that the idea of pairing her up with another would border on impossible. And for every absentee father, there is a committed ever present father who would take a bullet for his children. Believe it or not, many men are still busting a shot for their families and putting in the extra hours to secure decent lives for their families. Surprised? Better not be.

Whilst the men are persecuted, the ladies should look at themselves more keenly and realise that they also could be their own problem. You can only attract what you portray. A woman who keeps making leaps from one man’s bed to another shouldn’t honestly expect the guy to play blind and stick around for long. The endless bickering, selfishness and the unrealistic demands are some of the things that could easily send men packing. Interestingly, the men remain coy and bear all of this with no word uttered and are called fools for playing dumb to all the female drama.

And maybe if women stopped looking out for the trivial qualities in a man like a cute smile that could be eroded by cavities, a big juicy job that would be lost and instead went for more sustainable qualities like character,honesty,we would have more concrete and happiness filled relationships.

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