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How to be Zari the boss lady

zariTrue socialite: She tried out a singing career, which didn’t take off and then realised that you can be famous for just being famous. Ian Ford Nkera guides you on how to attract attention the Zari way

Drama was that kid who was abandoned and left to fend for themselves until a good Samaritan in the person of Zari showed up. Like a guardian angel, she took Drama in and raised him like her own that it seemed almost impossible to think of Zari and not think of Drama. The two have become inseparable and rely on each other severely for survival and that’s pretty much how you can sum up Zari’s life in a nutshell. Her life from the men she dates to the luxurious cars she drives has an element of theatre written all over it.

The concept of simplicity has forever eluded Zari that every deed she performs goes with a “Have You Seen Me” tag. There is absolutely no one who hungers for attention more than this light skinned beauty that acres of space in the tabloids will have one Zari tale written after the other. She has slowly clogged her way into the very busy Kampala nightlife with her very extravagant lifestyle and become one of the case studies of Kampala’s modern socialite. I will usher you into the world of Zari Hussein.

“A beauty as if…”
Surely there is a God. Doubts will instantly leave your head when you look at this lady because God was surely at his artistic best when he decided to patch a few edges here and there in her creation. I am quite convinced she would excite a tonne of warm blooded males out there. She seems well fed too from her neck downwards. A big kudos to her parents. A biological factor may come into the equation if you ever intend to be like her but in case you are not biologically gifted in the beauty department like she is, you could try a prescribed bleaching formula to give you that light skin. You shouldn’t worry about having a light skinned face and charcoal-dark toes. People ignore those things.

Zari Einstein
Anti you guys pose with those cars that you got on that salary loan scheme, so Zari decided to show you how it’s done. The industrious Zari decided to assemble pieces of aluminium together in the Katwe of South Africa and flew in a makeshift Lamborghini to excite you impressionable Ugandans. Eh but Ugandans have “maalo”. That scrap that you are watching pile up in your garage shouldn’t be put to waste so you should exercise the little physics you know to craft yourself something if you want to be like Zari.

All White Party
Zari has an annual party where people clad in white costumes meet up to basically show off. They shower themselves in expensive liquor and basically celebrate life in a grand way. Zari has been the chief organiser of this event and it has become one of the most anticipated on the entertainment calendar. I know someone who wishes her personality was as white as the theme-colour for her event. Eh but people can be mean. Be like Zari and celebrate life the Qatar- sheikh style. You don’t have to be rich to afford such a lifestyle. You can start small by blowing your Mother’s Union savings or poultry earnings in that malwa joint to be seen as the parish tycoon.

Famous because …
Zari found fame and fame found her. If you thought that you have to go panting on the track like Kiprotich did for an Olympic gold, you are mistaken. You can be famous by doing nothing really. Let the mortals outdo themselves with all these feats while you can just look beautiful with a pair of shades and serve us a full course meal of scandal. For crying out loud, Zari managed to get people following her every move so who said you can’t. Make a statement with your fake “Emporio Amanyi” shades or get pregnant by a certain kikuubo tycoon around town and see how fame comes your way.

Remote Handler?
Zari has always been exploring her options as far as love is concerned. From a tycoon herbalist to a basketballer and then back to the tycoon herbalist can only show you how experimental she can decide to be. Now she is madly in love with someone who does God knows what but you can trust the tycoon based in South Africa to always re surface. Zari’s love life looks like a badly directed soap opera but that is her, so you can always expect her to switch it up from one option to another. If you ever intend to be like Zari as far as love things are concerned, I am afraid I won’t coach you because you are definitely headed for disaster. Go ahead and be like Zari Hussein.


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