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How to be …Sleepless like Pallaso


DISTURBING THE PEACE: Pallaso returned from the US earlier in the year and he has given us a couple of hits and fights in equal measure. Ian Ford Nkera guides you on how to be like this brother from the Mayanja singing family.

It’s well documented that you can never divorce the Mayanjas from trouble. The singing brothers; Chameleone, Weasel and AK 47 despise harmony so much that they will do anything to disturb the peace of others or even themselves. They fight to exist, to belong and to express themselves, so I would understand if anyone out there mistook their behaviour for a disorder, but unfortunately it isn’t. Theirs is a lifestyle, a calling or even a birthright.
Peace is not something encrypted in their DNA and that’s why having three Mayanjas in a public place is bound to spark off a riot. And just when you thought you had seen it all with the three Mayanjas, a one Pius Mayanja aka Pallaso comes back from the US with a bang and leaves the whole music industry on tenterhooks. A fairly talented musician in his own right, Pallaso with the help of the Goodlyfe Crew and Sheebah Karungi, gifted us with hits such as Amaaso and Go Down Low respectively, only to channel his talent into writing one police statement after another as he watered down what would have been a promising career. If you want to be like the Team No Sleep singer, here is your guide:

Talented … oba???
The Mayanjas are incredibly talented. You have the heavyweight Chameleone making rounds as one of the biggest artistes in East Africa then you have Weasel globetrotting the world with Mowzey Radio as they release smash hits. You have Ak 47 not doing too badly for himself and then you have Pallaso.Talented??? It’s quite possible that he is or he could be riding on the fame of a popular family name.
For the few hits that he has under his belt, we could give him the benefit of the doubt. He does believe in his qualities which is all that matters I guess. To be like Pallaso, you will have to chase your dream. People will tell you that you can’t, but you will have to stick by your guns even if it means swapping one continent for another. Whatever you do keep moving forward.

Smart Pallaso
Pallaso is smart. Imagine a guy who knows that the immigration authorities are right on his heels then decides to marry an American girl and they even have the famous “visa” babies. I guess you’ve got to do what it takes to get that citizenship. Be the kind of guy who is willing to give up on the love of your life Nantumbwe for McPeters in order to have that citizenship.

Always on the run
Pallaso has always been running in his life. He ran away from his country of birth to chase the American dream only to find himself running again from the US immigration authorities. This saw him do time in an American prison for about six months. He ran away from his family in the US to return to Uganda to revamp his music career and found himself in a Tom and Jerry chase with the Ugandan Police so that basically sums up Pallaso’s life for you. His life could be likened to a sprint track. Don’t wait for your girlfriend to complain of morning sickness before you hit the exit door. Always have your stuff packed as you ponder your next address. Vanish at any sight of a Umeme or water bill.

No collabo no Pallaso
A collaboration is his comfort zone and he seems to have found exactly that in Sheebah.The two have recklessly dropped club jams that have gotten the Kampala party scene into a frenzy but Pallaso alone is a mess. His solo efforts have been forgettable. Be the person who is never known to do anything by themselves. And when your mother-in-law is demanding heavily for a grandchild, show up at your marital bedroom with a friend. Your wife will understand.

Pallaso has a talent in storytelling. Once upon a time this guy went on telling people how he started from the bottom and how he simanya grew up in the slums of oba where. He goes on about how he started from the bottom and now that he is at the top, people are fighting to bring him down.Lol. Dude has like two songs so what is this “being at the top” jazz of his? Be the kind to force rags to riches story. If you are going to tell people how you used to eat from the rubbish can, be 100 per cent sure that you are out of the rubbish can and you are never going back.

No sleep no peace
Does it surprise you that Pallaso subscribes to a music outfit called Team No Sleep? Dude is ever on the move so there is virtually no time to take a nap. Imagine a guy who gets too bored and storms people’s neighborhoods without their owner’s knowledge and torments the residents. Of course he won’t find time to sleep. Maybe he could squeeze in one hour or two at the police cell. Be the guy that everyone in the neighbourhood is wary of. You know the guys that spend their entire day in the neighbourhood playing ludo or pool on credit before going rogue on the neighbourhood in the evenings. Be like those guys. So there you have it. Go ahead be like Pallaso.


This is a humour column and the views expressed henceforth may not neccesarily be an objective assessment of the individual.

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