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How to be: Radio & Weasel


live the good lyfe: Here is how to be like the chart topping duo of Radio and Weasel. We all want to live the good life, but are you ready to literally fight for it.

Ntunga is another big tune by the star duo of Radio and Weasel this year. Rich in rhythm and melody, you are very likely to dance yourself lame and lose some morals in the process. That is typical Radio and Weasel for you. Their resume has hits spanning six years that these guys have slowly etched themselves into music folklore and easily become East Africa’s most successful duo. The Ntunga hit though highlights their troubles as they seem to make a plea for someone to mend them. Whether they are torn or on that break up path, one thing that you cannot take away from them is their sheer talent. Their ability to consistently deliver power jams and entertain us, year in year out. I take you through how you can live the ‘goodlyfe’.

Work hard and play smart
Whether you steal or make your songs yourself, it doesn’t matter. Just keep working. Put some edgy lyrics together and just like that, you will have a hit. Mind you, not just any lyrics. Have lyrics where you taunt some minister’s son about his wife and his parasitic behaviour on his father. He will forever sulk and throw tantrums but care less and keep the hits coming. Incite that ‘music doctor’ and convince him that he was never a real doctor and that his drugs are expired.

Be like a street bandit
Like Radio and Weasel, be the architect of every fight there was. Make sure that every fight that goes on in your town has your blueprint. Even if you are as emaciated as Radio and Weasel, throw whatever punch you can. If you are lucky, you could go away a jaw richer. You should be prepared to have jail as your occasional cool off place.

Fashion killer
Like Radio and Weasel, you will have to take the statement ‘dressed to kill’ a little literally. Like Mowzey Radio, you will have to buy the crafts shop out of bangles. Get any fabric but mostly polythene and silicon to sew yourself some clothes. If well coordinated, you would pull off the Goodlyfe look. What am I saying? You don’t have to coordinate anything. Feel free and wear anything.

No new friends

Just like the rapper Drake sung in the Dj Khaled hit, No New Friends, don’t make any new friends. Who needs new friends when you are Radio and Weasel? Have a go at anyone who wants to come close or break your little sect apart, the goodlyfe. Rant at everyone on social media and preach about how the Goodlyfe will always be there with or without people around you. Even old friends should suffer your wrath. Yes, the manager and his hang-ons should be shown their matching orders too.

Be like King Solomon
Like Radio and Weasel, have plenty of women littered all over the city. Like Weasel, you should have your DNA spread out in all suburbs of Kampala in the mould of children. Just like Weasel who has every parish and sub county with a Mayanja, you should do the same. Dont fear. Just like God said,”go fill the world”.

Go international
You will have to go global. You should work hard enough to make it to awards organised by global tv networks like MTV and BET. Play hide and seek with interviewers for fear of the very costly slip of the tongue. And when you see international stars like Nelly, don’t act timid. Be bold enough to ask for his “warid line” for a chat later.

Live the ‘Indian dream’
Have a structure and name it Neverland. Don’t get it twisted. Not anything like Michael Jackson’s legendary pad. Have a house that is almost make shift and have your entire clan stay with you. Like Radio and Weasel, have your baby mama live in one room while your producer crashes in the corridor. Have your manager pitch camp in the garage and your errand boy on the balcony. After all, you are one big happy family called the Goodlyfe.

Traditional herbalist
Radio and Weasel are avid farmers cum herbalists. Like them, you will have to grow a unique crop in your backyard. This herb has been popular with Jamaicans and has been known to take people to a whole different place. Higher than the clouds, you get to touch base with the heavens after a few puffs. Note that the police could sniff their way to your secret garden.

Prodigal sons
Realise that you were the bad child and go around making up with everyone you wronged. Top of the list is the reptile called the Chameleone. Kiss and make up but beware of the ever changing colours of the Chameleone. The minister’s son should be next in the queue and live happily ever after.
So there you have it, just like that you have lived the “Goodlyfe”.

Break up to make up

Radio and Weasel were sworn enemies with Bebe Cool until they were re-united late last year after the Battle of Champions concert. Now they are bossom buddies.

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