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How to be Iron lady Miria Matembe

Miria Matembe dancing at a function.Say it as it is: To be Matembe, you must be outspoken. Don’t fear to say something because it might rub someone the wrong way, writes Ian Ford Nkera.

What if Dr Miria Rukoza Koburunga Matembe was introduced to you as your mother-in-law or even better still your landlady? What if you took a spin in your car around town without a driving licence or insurance and you saw that Miria Matembe was the traffic officer waving you down for questioning? The fear that has gripped you now as you read is what has always gripped anyone that has crossed the path of the controversial woman.

Known for her fiery character and no- nonsense attitude, Miria Matembe has been pivotal in the fight against corruption as well as for women’s rights often slaying anyone who has displayed acts of greed or people that demean the role of women in society. Whichever way you look at it, the former legislator and former Ethics and Integrity minister is one for the headlines. I will thereby navigate you through the world of the renowned women’s rights activist and veteran politician.

Matembe the fighter
Her story is a tale of fighting against odds. Born in a humble family, it has been sheer grit and determination that has seen Matembe scale the heights to where she has reached. As a teenager, she was told that girls had no purpose in society and we saw her shame those people by rising to Cabinet minister and being one of the most powerful and influential women in Uganda. She had to beat the boys at their game as she is not one known to back down or be intimidated. So ladies, if you are going to to be like Matembe, start by learning how to change a car tyre. Don’t whatsapp Mr to come and help you when a car breaks down because Matembe would be the kind to do it herself.

Matembe the family woman
Don’t be fooled by her tough-talking antics and controversies. People who know Matembe admit that she is a sweet person who puts family before anything else. She is a devout born-again Christian who sheds her militant cloak at the gate of her residence and embraces the role of a loving wife and mother.

She performs admirably at both roles so as unbelievable as it sounds, Matembe is the kind who would wear her apron and cook her husband a meal. Yes, she can mingle that kalo and serve out a decent meal. That Matembe attacking government is a sweetheart who humbles herself before her husband. So ladies who get a masters degree and think they are all that should think again. You could be accomplished and still be a respectable mother and loving wife just like the Matembe manual reads.

Matembe the queen dancer
The paka chini convention has always seen Rebecca Kadaga and Miria Matembe outdo themselves on the dancefloor with Matembe often leaving revellers speechless with her repertoire of dance skills. While the bend over dance routine may not be her cup of tea, the paka chini is done with conviction by Matembe. Dance yourself lame if you are going to be like the sleek hot stepper Matembe. Imagine Matembe doing the “shuffle”. Please don’t laugh because we are all sure she does it with admirable calmness.

Keep it natural
A conference or formal event will have all these people overdoing it with fancy clothing waiting for a Kodak moment but you can trust Matembe to do things a little differently. While all these ladies are walking around uncomfortably in heels and ill-fitting dresses, Miria Matembe will show up in a pair of shorts and a pair of Adidas sneakers and also show you that she can be the guest of honour and steal your show in no time. Matembe has no time for your make-up. Who needs make-up when you are a natural beauty like Matembe? So do things your way if you are going to be like her. A little baby oil here and there and you are good to go.

Give pigs what belong to pigs
Matembe hates men who are chauvinistic and disrespectful towards women. “How do you come from a bar smelling alcohol and muchomo and you just jump on me anyhow?”Matembe once made this remark in reference to men who just force women into some “night activities” without preparing them. Men who do this irk Matembe and need to change. Another breed of men who irk Matembe to the core are the kind that feel their ‘tools’ would find comfort in the bodies of young girls and babies.

Matembe feels such men deserve castration, an exercise famously used on pigs and many of such livestock called the castration that robs you of the power to “do anything” if you know what I mean. To be like Matembe, you must have unique thoughts on the specie that is man.
So there you have it Sqoopers.You can now be like Miria Matembe.


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