BEAUTY WITH A PURPOSE: Flavia shows that you can be beautiful, hardworking and with sense in that thing you carry on your shoulders, writes Ian Ford Nkera
The sad thing about life is that some people will look like Kahinda Otafiire and others will look like Flavia Tumusiime. It’s painful but true. While you are still digesting the thought of this huge contrast, you remember a special breed of people in the breath of Kassiano Wadri, Ofwono Opondo and Edward Ssekandi that you feel even God surely deserved a day or two of rest from this creation business. It’s after His rest that I would like to believe He sculptured fine specimens like Flavia that have made these dusty Kampala streets a safe place to live in.
The role Flavia has played in driving hardcore drunkards out of bars to take interest in national issues on TV cannot be downplayed. She has literally brought people’s husbands back home on Mondays to watch the evening news that even children are getting to see their fathers for the first time. Flavia Tumusiime’s beauty is a tool she has used well from her early years as a teen TV presenter to her adult years as an events Mc and TV show host. People have always obsessed about her beauty that the splash her new role as an NTV news anchor has caused doesn’t come as a surprise. If you find Flavia admirable and want to be like her, here is your guide.
If you are a civil servant winding up her 30s while choking on office dust, I would like to congratulate you on successfully missing out on your dreams. Flavia started this TV thing way too early so you may want to re-direct your children through that dream path you missed. Drag that spoilt brat of a child to any TV station and dump him at the reception. This will be good training and the kid might help you out on your rent. Do not stifle your child’s talent. These stubborn kids we send out to our grandmothers in the villages mbu to learn how to behave could actually be the jewels of this nation. Listen to them and guide them.
Hustle real hard
This babe has really looked for dimes. She is on radio as a presenter then occasionally doing some average acting somewhere before later on hosting one of these many TV shows. Chick hustles like a guy to be honest. You wouldn’t be surprised if her face endorsed a company that made razorblades. She is in so much circulation. Either times can be tough or she is just basically expanding her horizons as an entertainer. If you want to be like the industrious Flavia Tumusiime, you must be willing to be more than just a pretty face and actually get your hands dirty. Don’t be shy to vend old clothes or anything that could bring in extra dime.
Flavia the man ‘killer’
Men were fine until this nuisance of a hottie decided to grace the screens as a TV anchor. Why Lord? Men are fighting with their kids for TV remotes and wives feel they have an imaginary co-wife. The problem with having Flavia as a TV anchor is that you never understand the severity of a situation in the news bulletin. You don’t know whether to focus on the beautifully engineered mole on her lip or the war in Syria. You are left in limbo.
To be like Flavia Tumusiime, you must have that natural flawless beauty going on. If you are not naturally endowed, pray to God that your boss will ignore the boda-boda accident scars that sit firmly on your legs and focus on the better things in life like your skin complexion. If it doesn’t appear lighter, swim in a Jik-inspired bath. You have to make all these men drool over you. It’s just that simple.
Keep everyone guessing
Flavia has kept her private life very private to the chagrin of the public. She has been linked to everyone but nothing solid ever comes out of those rumours. She is as if single but not single. She probably locks up her chaps in her apartment. Who would know? I am sure her guy isn’t sure if he is truly her guy.
To be like Flavia Tumusiime, you could be like these girls who feel that being beautiful is a tool to stress every man alive. Make guys audition to have just one text message replied. This will keep them confused on whether they have hope or not. Make guys buy you drinks and vanish. No man can have a claim over you. Just be the hot girl every guy eventually ignores as just being there. No mulamwa(focus).
There you have it. Go ahead and be like the stunning Flavia.
This is a humour column and the views expressed henceforth may not neccesarily be an objective assessment of the individual.