1.Wouldn’t it be better if the census was carried out by our local artistes? Who wouldn’t want to be counted by Bobi Wine, Bebe or Chameleone?
2.Isn’t this whole census thing an advanced form of roll call? Can it be done, like at Namboole, where your name is called out and you just answer, “present sir”?
3.“Are you ready to be counted?” So the adverts go. Should we first take a bath and change into new clothes to show that we are ready?
4.I hear they even count goats and cows. So will the rats and mice under our beds be catered for as well? I’m just curious!
5.How will they count people like me, Sevo and those in big offices? Will they have to first make appointments too??
6.And what time will they come to count us? Which Ugandan will welcome you at lunch time? Mbu they don’t have extra food for you!
7.What method will they use to count those cannibals we read about in Rakai? Just who is ready to risk being eaten, for the sake of counting people? Hmm.
8.Imagine Walukaga made a census ad, would teenagers still be interested in being counted? Wouldn’t someone like Irene Ntale be a better choice?
9.So how shall we benefit from being counted? Will they give us more mosquito nets or will they buy pampers for our babies? Tufunila wa?
10. People were paying to be registered for national IDs, so shall we pay to be counted too?? Isn’t that what makes us Ugandan? #corruption.